So you think you're ready to get married? You're not. Because no one is ever really ready for marriage. It's like sky diving without a parachute. Just kidding. I've been married for 9 years (to the same woman), and I love it. So here's 5 questions I should have asked myself before I sealed the deal.
5. How Am I Going to Pay for This?
Marriage is a huge financial undertaking. It's like a bankruptcy you never get out of (JK). But you seriously need to think about the financial aspect of it. Are you going to support a family flipping burgers? Probably not, unless you're the owner of the restaurant, and the burgers are like $50 a piece. So start planning, saving, and educating yourself in the necessary skills to excel in our economy. Or be awesome and go off grid, raise some veggies and chickens.
4. Am I Ready to Lead a Household?
Are you ready to take on the mantle of head of the household? Are you ready to be the decision maker for your family? Can you make the right decisions? In the last 9 years, I can say I've made some pretty dumb decisions. And the consequences of those effect everybody. So get your head on straight, and get serious about your life. Your wife, and future children will be looking to you for answers, and you need to deliver.
3. Am I Mentally, and Emotionally Ready for the Responsibility
This is kind of a spinoff number 4, but you need to get your mind, and emotions prepared for marriage. Your focus will be taking care of your wife. That is not the time to be working through all the bad things that happened in your life. So deal with that stuff now so that it doesn't hurt your marriage later. Because it will.
2. Am I all In?
Are you holding anything back? Keeping the back door open in case you have to bolt? I hope not. Read my article on Marriage: All In. Because once you go through that door, there's no going back. So are you ready to put all of your chips on the table and play your hand? I remember the exact moment when I knew I was all in with my marriage. It's a beautiful, and life-changing thing. I hope you get that moment too. So if you have reservations, deal with them now.
1. Am I Squared Away with God?
This is first on the list, because it's the most important. You need to get your faith life squared away. God has to lead you, and you have to lead your family. You can't do that if your Bible is acting as a dust collector on your dresser. So get in your Bible, pray, meditate, and get some wisdom. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. So get wise.
I hope this list helps you guys. I don't think I asked any of these questions when I got married. And I wish I did. It would have saved a lot of bumps in the road. Each of these, for me, has a hard-hitting life lesson attached to it. So save yourself the pain, and be proactive.